Funny...I know someone who does similar to that. I've been working to help them understand they don't have to shrink themselves down or hold themselves back here out of fear of what people will think - helping them embrace their confidence more. I'd say more about them, but the specifics of their marginalization were shared in confidence, so it's not something I have the right to explain...and I don't want to invite speculation even by making it obvious who I'm alluding to. Suffice it to say that I've got a nice clear picture, though.
I've got plenty of experience being hated myself, but I reacted very differently to it, so those experiences aren't too applicable. Also, as you've noticed, I'm not all that physically intimidating. Certainly not compared to some of the company I keep. Even if I'd been more reclusive or done more to avoid confrontation, I'd never have had much need to try to make myself smaller unless it was just to present a harder target to hit.
That said, I doubt you have much call to try to make yourself bigger or more imposing here...but you've obviously got no need to minimize yourself around anyone, either, especially people you've known for awhile. Is it only with people who knew the old you? Or do you sometimes fall into the habit around other people as well?
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Date: 2021-03-17 12:12 pm (UTC)I've got plenty of experience being hated myself, but I reacted very differently to it, so those experiences aren't too applicable. Also, as you've noticed, I'm not all that physically intimidating. Certainly not compared to some of the company I keep. Even if I'd been more reclusive or done more to avoid confrontation, I'd never have had much need to try to make myself smaller unless it was just to present a harder target to hit.
That said, I doubt you have much call to try to make yourself bigger or more imposing here...but you've obviously got no need to minimize yourself around anyone, either, especially people you've known for awhile. Is it only with people who knew the old you? Or do you sometimes fall into the habit around other people as well?