My parents had...questionable parenting tactics of their own, let's say. I've had multiple people freak out when I've described some of the things they did with me that I personally don't think are that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things, which I think is mostly cultural differences but may also be a little them being extreme...though from my perspective, I couldn't tell you how much of one or the other there is. That said, I don't consider my relationship with them bad, even if it's not effusively close, either, so...I don't think I can say I'm in the same camp as you, or even Lorenz.
Although as far as Lorenz goes, I do have very different political ideas from my father, and I wouldn't mind completely going against his policies on any number of things if I have the chance. No sense of filial duty would convince me to follow my father down a course I didn't believe was a good one. So maybe that's why I can't understand Lorenz too well.
I'm sorry your father's as bad as that, though, Sylvain. You deserve better.
You're not wrong about history. It just feels miserable actually living it out. When you're just reading about it, it's simple - these things already happened, there's no changing them. Maybe this or that event could have been averted if the right thing had happened at the right time, if the right information had been had, but those things didn't happen and people didn't know, so things played out this way or that. But when you're living in the moment...there's this awful, constant feeling that you could fix this, if you could make the right things happen. If you could make the right call at the right moment, or catch someone before they can make a terrible mistake, or convince someone to change their mind.
In the moment, you reach those crisis points, those divergences...and you always think it's possible, you must be able to change things, they're happening right now and you're part of them. But despite your best efforts...you still end up with bad outcomes. And you're left to wonder if you could have avoided them somehow, if you had your chance to change things for the better and you fumbled it. And when people, a century from now, read the historical accounts of our time...will they be kind? Or will our legacies be "if they'd just done this instead, so much could have been averted"?
Well...I say 'our'. But I guess this is something only commanders really have to worry about much. Edelgard, Dimitri, and me. And Teach.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2021-01-09 04:13 am (UTC)Although as far as Lorenz goes, I do have very different political ideas from my father, and I wouldn't mind completely going against his policies on any number of things if I have the chance. No sense of filial duty would convince me to follow my father down a course I didn't believe was a good one. So maybe that's why I can't understand Lorenz too well.
I'm sorry your father's as bad as that, though, Sylvain. You deserve better.
You're not wrong about history. It just feels miserable actually living it out. When you're just reading about it, it's simple - these things already happened, there's no changing them. Maybe this or that event could have been averted if the right thing had happened at the right time, if the right information had been had, but those things didn't happen and people didn't know, so things played out this way or that. But when you're living in the moment...there's this awful, constant feeling that you could fix this, if you could make the right things happen. If you could make the right call at the right moment, or catch someone before they can make a terrible mistake, or convince someone to change their mind.
In the moment, you reach those crisis points, those divergences...and you always think it's possible, you must be able to change things, they're happening right now and you're part of them. But despite your best efforts...you still end up with bad outcomes. And you're left to wonder if you could have avoided them somehow, if you had your chance to change things for the better and you fumbled it. And when people, a century from now, read the historical accounts of our time...will they be kind? Or will our legacies be "if they'd just done this instead, so much could have been averted"?
Well...I say 'our'. But I guess this is something only commanders really have to worry about much. Edelgard, Dimitri, and me. And Teach.